Wednesday 31 October 2007

U's:5 Stafford:1

Hurrah, we’ve finally won an FA Cup game. Even if it has taken us three matches to beat an awful awful Stafford side, at least we’re in the next round and have recorded a suitably convincing victory ahead of Saturday’s trip to Devon.

JQ shuffled his pack again, recalling Darryl Knights and Lee Boylan in place of LFW and Danny Brown, and the two diminutive strikers formed a three-pronged attack with Scotty Rendell.

Stafford actually started fairly well, and for the first 15 minutes looked about as cohesive as they have at any point in the two matches I’ve seen them play this season, matching us for possession and chances. Draper shot over the bar for the visitors, Mawene was off target with a free kick, while at the other end Boylan had a shot blocked and Rendell headed a Knights cross over.

Luke McShane wasn’t overly extended, but seemed worryingly shaky when coming for crosses and generally commanding his area. While I don’t expect him to be Danny Potter, it doesn’t bode especially well for the upcoming Torquay match, given that the Gulls score a massive proportion of their goals from set pieces. Nevertheless, I suppose you can only deal with what’s thrown (or kicked) at you and he performed most of his duties satisfactorily.

United seemed to grow in confidence as the half went on, and despite Mark Peters almost slicing in a comedy own goal, we eventually took a deserved lead. Rendell worked the ball into the path of Knights, who slipped it through for Boylan, who got away from his marker and drilled a trademark finish across the keeper into the far post. A proper strikers goal from a proper striker.

Rangers immediately sacrificed their five man midfield, with portly goal-getter David McNiven replacing Draper and joining Neil Grayson, United’s ageless nemesis, up front.

It didn’t have the desired effect though, and five minutes before half time Scotty Rendell notched his 11th of the season. This time Boylan provided the pass, and although keeper Danny Alcock (haha, Al-cock) blocked his shot, the ball spun up nicely for the striker to nod it into the empty net, despite the efforts of a defender on the line.

United weren’t finished there though, and effectively killed the game off with a stunning third right on the whistle. A decent spell of possession culminated in a Gleeson pass into Boylan on the edge of the box. His lay off was perfect for Wolleaston, who lashed a brilliant first time effort past Alcock. As Alan Partridge might say, Scorchio! 3-0.

As in the Farsley game earlier this season, United took their foot off the gas a little at the start of the second half, and allowed the visitors back into it with a soft goal. Morrison failed to deal with Luke Potter’s cross, and Kevin Street (currently training as a priest fact fans) picked up the loose ball and beat the helpless McShane.

United hearts were in mouths again minutes later when sub Nathan Smith got clear on goal, but McShane did well to force him wide, then block his shot when it eventually came in. A second at that point might have made things unnecessarily interesting.

Knights had already struck the post by the time Stafford gifted him his first goal for United. Alcock’s clearance struck the back of the Yeovil loanee, and rebounded to Boylan inside the box. He unselfishly squared back to Knights, whose scuffed shot beat two defenders on the line.

With 20 minutes still to play, you sensed more goals were there for the taking against a tiring Stafford defence, but United could only add one further strike. A fine pass from the outstanding Wolleaston released sub Stephen Smith, whose low cross was tucked away by Knights for his second. The young striker could have completed his hatrick after fine approach play from another sub, LFW, and Courtney Pitt. Unfortunately he just failed to get enough purchase on his first time shot and it flew wide of the goal.

Despite United only playing well in patches, this was as comprehensive a win as the scoreline suggests. It will be interesting to see what JQ does on Saturday. Does he continue with the three strikers who contributed four goals last night, or does he play an extra midfielder and/or bring back the experienced head (and elbows) of big Leo. By all accounts Torquay are better going forward than they are defensively, so attack could be the best form of defence. However, it would be a brave manager who plays three strikers in an away match with the league leaders.

Man of the Match: Rob Wolleaston – Admittedly Wolly was given a lot of time and space to play by Stafford, but he made the most of it with some tiggerish tackling and accurate passing, not to mention that superb goal. In the continuing absence of Danny Brown he’s turning into a massive player for us.




Tease of the Match: Tom Youngs – Tiny Tom failed to make it off the bench in any of our three games against Rangers. How many times last night did he jog up and down the touchline, flicking his calves expectantly, only to disappear back into the dug out minutes later? Shame, it would have been nice to see him on the hallowed turf again.

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Tuesday 30 October 2007

AOB: Idlewild @ The Junction

Idlewild should be more famous than they are. I know everybody says that about their favourite bands, but in this case it’s true. Their back catalogue is jam-packed with catchy songs perfect for jumping up and down to, and, one slightly iffy album aside (Warnings/Promises, which still contains two of their best songs, El Capitan and Love Steals us from Loneliness), their output has been consistently good over the years.

“It’s good to be back in Cambridge”, said lead singer Roddy Womble during last nights gig. “Last time we played here it was out on its own in the middle of a big car park.” That they are again playing venues the size of the Junction is probably a sad indictment of the bands career trajectory of late.

Oh well, never mind. The rest of the world’s loss was the 300 or so people at the Junction’s gain. Arriving on the back of a greatest hits album, Idlewild were always going to play a crowd-pleasing set, and so it proved, as they kicked off with I Don’t Have a Map and the epic You Held the World in you Arms.

Songs from the bands last studio album, Make Another World, feature prominently. Everything (As it Moves) got what is apparently its first airing of their current tour, while No Emotion and In Competition for the Worst Times were both enthusiastically received. The latter was particularly intense, with the band playing it at break neck speed and reducing a three minute track to about 30 seconds (at least that’s what it seemed like).

Old favourites When I Argue I see Shapes and Everybody says you’re so Fragile also went down well, while their encore contained rare outings for Chandelier and 4 People Do Good, alongside perhaps their biggest hit, American English.

Greatest hits albums can often signal the end of a bands career, but one hopes this is not the case for Idlewild, who on this kind of form still have plenty of years ahead of them.

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Monday 29 October 2007

Quinn to Port Vale?

Imagine you’re a football manager and your name is, lets say, Quinny Jimm. Now, you’re contract your current club ends at the end of the season. This club is, lets imagine, 200 miles from your home, and a vacancy has come up with a team in a higher division which is just down the road from your house. You apply for this job but get turned down. Do you:

a) Put in down to experience and move on.
b) Vow to reap bloody revenge on the bastards who have rejected you.
c) Get the chairman who rejected you to ‘leak’ the information to the press that you applied for his job, thereby strengthening your negotiating position at your current club by creating the illusion that you are in demand.

Answers on a post card please.

Call me a cynic, but I take Jimmy Quinn’s strongly worded denial that he was ever interested in the Port Vale job with a pinch of salt.

There are a couple of reasons for this: Firstly, what interest would the Vale chairman have in releasing JQ’s name, but not any of the others that applied for the job, unless he was specifically asked to do so? Secondly, there is Jimmy’s assertion that someone representing him contacted Vale on his behalf but without his permission. Are we expected to believe that the man who has in the past expressed his hatred of the sub-human scum that call themselves football agents has one himself, let alone one who doesn’t do what he’s asked? The whole thing makes no sense.

I don’t blame Jimmy for going for a job nearer to home with a job in a higher division – he has to look after himself after all. But, as I said in a previous post, I hope our board don’t get pressured into giving him a longer contract just yet. We’re not playing brilliantly at the moment, and it would be nice to think that JQ will get us back to winning ways ASAP, and that we’ll still be in and around the play offs come Christmas. Then we can give him a new contract, hopefully get back into the football league, and everyone will live happily ever after.

Of course I might be being totally unfair on our Jimmy, and his not-me-honest-guv comments may have been totally sincere, but it seems a big coincidence that all this speculation about him joining other clubs has come about since he started hinting that he wanted a new contract.

Anyways, on the pitch hopefully we can beat Stafford tomorrow and progress to the second round of the FA Cup for the first time in what seems like decades. Although Aldershot/Crawley in the next round isn’t exactly the most glamorous of ties, it would be nice to get a little cup run going. Plus losing to Stafford, one of the worst football teams I’ve ever seen at this level, would be the kind of embarrassment that belongs among last seasons ‘performances’.

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Friday 26 October 2007

AOB: 24 heaven

(This blog recently had its 1000th visitor. While this probably isn’t very much in the grand scheme of things, it seems a fairly significant landmark to me so thanks to everyone who’s perused my site so far, I love you all :) )

Yeah, it’s another AOB. I can’t really think of anything interesting to write about United at the moment, unless one counts an essay on the career highlights of Terry Fleming as interesting, ho hum.

The trailer for the series seven of 24 was released this week, raising my excitement levels to previously unreached heights:

http://www.bebo.com/FlashBox.jsp?FlashBoxId=4920439582&

I love 24, it’s my favourite TV show of the last few years, possibly of all time. For anyone unfamiliar with it, the basic premise is this: Kiefer Sutherland stars as Jack Bauer, a government agent working in for the Counter Terrorist Unit (CTU). If you watch the show over an extended period of time you come to realise that, while practically every other character is expendable one way or the other, Jack is invincible. If he was shot in the head he’d probably pull the bullet out, sew the wound up himself and be back up torturing a suspect or shouting “TELL ME WHERE THE BOMB IS” within minutes, or something.

Bauer is without doubt one of the coolest characters ever created. He kills and tortures using levels of imagination beyond any normal human, his loyalty to his government and country is bizarrely unflagging, and he has an unerring ability to make people do what he wants just by uttering the immortal words “you’re gonna have to trust me.”

Every series revolves around a terrorist threat of some sort (usually perpetrated by a nameless country in the middle east), which Jack is out to stop, despite the interference and general incompetence of his superiors and colleagues. Luckily, being the uber-maverick, he has no problems disobeying anyone in authority or breaking every rule and law ever dreamed up, so long as it for the good of his country that is.

The other selling point of the show is that it occurs in real time, and the events all take place over the course of one day (there are 24, hour long episodes) so while the action is going on, the clock ticks on in the background towards the inevitable (and usually bloody) conclusion.

If this all sounds a bit ludicrous and repetitive that’s because it is, but by the time you’ve watched a few episodes you won’t care because you’ll be sucked in. The plot twists and turns at break neck pace, with characters going from good, to bad, to good again, often in the space of a few hours, and even though hardly any of it makes sense, it’s just brilliant, compulsive, fun, TV.



So if you’ve never seen it before, I would urge you to buy or rent the DVD’s and prepare to relinquish control on your life for a few days. As Jack would say, just trust me on this.

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Wednesday 24 October 2007

AOB: Cambridge City:1 Eastbourne Borough:1

I’m surely not the only person who has occasionally looked back at last season and thought, what if. What if Robbie Simpson hadn’t discovered how to score goals, what if JQ hadn’t stumbled upon a formation that worked for us, what if our rivals hadn’t been quite so hopeless?

I suppose it’s all fairly irrelevant now seeing as we didn’t go down and it seems unlikely we’ll be involved in a relegation scrap this time around, but I don’t think it hurts to remember what an absolute disaster it would have been if we had been relegated. Certainly puts our current troubles (if indeed a couple of unimpressive draws can be called troubles) into perspective.

The what ifs were on my mind a fair bit as I trooped down to Milton Road last night to watch City in action against Conference South leaders Eastbourne Borough. It was the first time I’d been to see a proper (ie not our annual pre-season friendly) game at Milton Road for about six years, and while I know that in reality both teams are less than 30 places below us in the grand scheme of things, everything about the proceedings screamed proper non-league. City’s sponsor-less kit for one thing, which looked like the kind of thing one might see on Coldhams Common on a Sunday morning.

There was also the prevalence of fattys. At least in our league most of the players look vaguely like professional athletes, whereas the Eastbourne side was packed with blokes who probably enjoy the odd pastry-based delicacy.

City looked considerably lighter than their visitors, with the exception of good old Michael Gash. Gashy has of course been transformed from the lumbering oaf that turned out for us last season into a lethal goal machine, having already registered nine strikes this season. Goal ten arrived in the eighth minute, when the Eastbourne defence failed to deal with a routine hoof forward from Lee Chaffey. The striker nipped and toe poked a lob over the advancing Lee Hook.

Gash’s all round game seems to have improved no end too, and he was the focal point for pretty much all of City’s attacks, using his bear-like strength (although obviously being a human, he's not actually a bear) and, ahem, ample arse to hold the ball up and feed his smaller, nippier colleagues, Lee Roache and ex-U Ash Fuller. The Lilywhites were a lot more direct than I expected, a tactic probably necessitated by their current injury crisis. Playing an odd 5-2-3 cum 3-4-3 formation, they had much the better of the opening exchanges, making light of their relatively poor league position.

However, once Eastbourne got going it was easy to see why they are top of the table, as they displayed some neat passing football, with left winger Matt Crabb looking particularly impressive. The dashing Shane Herbert was called into action to turn away two long range shots from one of the porkers, Matt Smart, while Andy Aitkin somehow missed two chances which, while I don’t like to overstate my football prowess, I probably would have scored.

So City were probably a tad fortunate to be ahead by half time, but they started the second half well, and Eastbourne could have been reduced to ten men when Neil Jenkins brought down Roache who was heading for goal. Although the striker had a clear sight of Hook, he was fairly wide and the presence of a covering player in the centre probably saved Jenkins’ bacon.

City boss Gary Roberts withdrew Fuller and Roache about midway through the second half, as City sat back to try and defend their lead. When will managers learn that this is almost always a bad move? Eastbourne made a triple substitution of their own, and Aitkin went close again with a powerful shot that rippled the side of the net.

When the equaliser came it was almost a carbon-copy of the goal. A long ball bounced in the area, sub Nathan Crabb turned and fired past the exposed Herbert with City’s defenders appealing in vain for offside. His celebration, a Lua Lua-esque flip, belonged at a higher level.

All in all it was a very enjoyable match, in which a draw was probably a fair result. Although I’m confident we could beat either side, they’d both be more than a match for the likes of Stafford and Farsley. As ever, Roberts is doing a terrific job at City, and their good-humoured, vocal supporters would be a much more welcome sight in the BSP than the Johnny-come-lately village idiots from across the A14. Football really isn’t fair, is it.

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Monday 22 October 2007

U's:1 Salisbury:1

Just to prove that you don’t need any footballing knowledge to assess the failings of our teams on Saturday, here are some comments from the football virgins I went to the Salisbury match with:

“Its not good play to keep heading it backwards and forwards is it?”

“Aren’t they meant to take more than one touch?”

“Number 19 doesn’t win many headers for such a big bloke does he? And he seems to have a really negative attitude, he’s always moaning.”

The first South Stand Initiative match of this season was once again a great success, with over 1,000 new fans packing the South Stand, and in our case, Block F of the main stand. Credit must once more go to Will Jones and his army of volunteers. Unfortunately United didn’t exactly put in a performance that will have the newbies racing back for more, once again succumbing to a late goal and dropping two points against eminently beatable opposition.

We started well enough, with new boy Daryl Knights making a lively debut, playing in the hole behind LFW and Rendell. A spell of early pressure culminated in the first goal. A corner was cleared to Pitt, who shifted the ball back to the taker, Quinton. He put in an inviting low cross which Rendell reached ahead of a gaggle of defenders to poke the ball past the keeper via the post. Hurrah, 1-0.

At the other end Robbie Matthews was proving to be a useful outlet for the visitors, winning his share of headers against Mark Albrighton and co. Highly rated strike partner Matt Tubbs should’ve equalised when a poor Gleeson clearance fell to him just inside the box, but with Potter caught flat footed he fired past the post. Rendell headed wide for United, while Knights successfully chased a lost cause in the left corner, robbing a defender but dragging his shot off target.

Having let Salisbury get away with blocking quick free kicks three or four times, referee Beck gave an indication of the inconsistency that was to come in the second half by booking Leo for kicking the ball away. The perma-tanned official had already displayed a complete lack of understanding of the advantage rule, stopping play several times when he could have let it flow, and this was to cost United dear just before half time. Knights was fouled on the edge of the box, and the ball broke to Rendell, who clipped a superb first time shot over the keeper. Unfortunately Mr Beck had instantly blown for a foul, when a delay of a few seconds would’ve seen Scotty’s goal stand, grr. United wasted the free kick, and just before half time lost Darren Quinton to a nasty looking injury.

Never mind though, Salisbury didn’t look up to much and surely United would go on and secure the win? Er, maybe not. As the second half progressed, we got deeper and deeper, aiming long balls in the general direction of the strikers with little thought or pattern to our play. One breakaway saw Pitt race down the left but, with three players unmarked screaming for the ball at the far post, his cross was woefully underhit and easily dealt with by the defenders.The visitors were having plenty of possession now, and winning free kicks almost at will, thanks largely to the lovely Mr Beck. Every Salisbury tumble was greeted with a blast of his whistle, although he did turn away a penalty claim when Tubbs fell under challenge from Morro. United weren’t helping their cause by giving the ball away with alarming regularity, and somewhat inevitably Salisbury took full advantage with two minutes left. Gleeson and Wolleaston got in a muddle on the right hand side, and lost possession to Andy Sandell, whose low cross was tucked away by substitute Marvin Brown.

Draws are coming with alarming regularity now, and JQ and Fester need to sort it out ASAP. We face Torquay, Burton, and Kidderminster in the coming weeks, teams that won’t let us get away with a point if we play as badly as we did in the second half on Saturday. One hopes these dropped points in ‘easy’ games don’t come back to haunt us later in the season.

Man of the Match: Mark Peters – The back three acquitted themselves well for the most part, with Rhino in particularly unbeatable mood. The sponsors got it right for once.






Annoying-bloke-you-want-to-punch of the Match: The fella sitting behind me, who did nothing but whinge throughout. At one point he stated that “this is the worst match I’ve ever seen up here.” Did last season completely pass you by my friend?

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Wednesday 17 October 2007

AOB: Swing Low Sweet Bandwagon

Ahh, good old Rugby. I’m sure you’ve heard the old saying – Football is gentleman’s game played by thugs, and Rugby is a thugs game played by, er, public-school educated, middle class, tossers.

Of course England are in the world cup final this weekend, and as it was four years ago, the country is GRIPPED by RUGBY FEVER. It’s also GRIPPED by that other favourite English sport – bandwagon jumping.

As you may have gathered I don’t like Rugby very much. That’s not to say I begrudge Rugby fans their moment of glory, it’s just everything else that goes with it that I can’t stand.

Now I can kind of get past the aforementioned bandwagon jumping and the pretending to understand Rugby’s myriad of rules. It doesn’t especially bother me that most of the great British public seemed unaware that the tournament was going on before the last two games, and I don’t even get riled by the fact that most of the ‘fans’ don’t know the names of any of the players beyond Jonny, and Dallaglio, and, er, is Will Carling still playing?

But what does get on my nerves is that whenever we do vaguely well at a minority sport the media always start spouting mindless rubbish like “Why can’t footballers behave more like Rugby/Cricket/Ping Pong players?”.

The odorous Jon Gaunt was saying something along these lines in his column in The Sun this week, and he is not alone.

Now, I’m no big fan of Premiership players, who are without doubt a generally stupid, self-obsessed group of individuals, but the reason rugby players aren’t publicly outed as twats as often as their footballuler counter parts is that for the majority of the time nobody cares about Rugby, or any other sport for that matter. We are a football country, therefore we give footballers a lot of money, and a high profile, but reserve the right to tut at them when they get drunk and have one night stands with Charlene from Chelmsford.

If we other sportsmen had similar amounts of cash and fame, you would get the same result. Look at cricketers: pre-ashes 2005 nobody really paid attention to them, but since the game became ‘cool’ we know that KP and Flintoff are piss heads and that Paul Collingwood likes to relax away from the sport by visiting Girls-A-Go-Go.

On the pitch, even if we ignore the fact that Rugby players routinely kick, punch, gouge, and stamp on opponents, the difference in discipline between round and oval ball players is surely down to the way the rules are applied. In Rugby, if you show any kind of dissent you get punished straight away. In Football, some refs will book you, some send you off, and some just ignore it, particularly if you are Wayne Rooney. When the FA (and FIFA) grow a pair and start taking a consistent, hard line, approach to dissent, I'm pretty sure we’ll see an immediate improvement in the behaviour of footballers.

As I say, I don’t seek to deprive the rugger-buggers of their moment of glory. It just annoys me when our glorious heroes of the Stade-de-France are held up as paradigms of sporting virtue. Oh well, I guess I should take comfort in the fact that whether we win or lose on Saturday, Rugby will have sunk from the public consciousness by this time next month. Until 2011 that is.

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Monday 15 October 2007

Stafford Rangers:1 U's:1 - We'll meet again

NB: I have photos which I'll add later today or tomorrow

I had the following conversation with my other half on the way home from Saturday’s game:

Me – The FA cup’s coming up soon

Her – I hate stupid cup games

Me – Why?

Her – They’re pointless. We always play some terrible team and lose

She is, of course, sort-of right. Anyone other relatively new fans will also only remember constant cup-related misery. We haven’t been past the first round of any competition (except the LDV) since 02/03, and the last time we had a home tie in an FA Competition was when we lost a replay to Macclesfield - four years, four managers, and about a million players ago.

So it was no surprise to see us given an away tie at Stafford in today’s FA Cup fourth qualifying round draw. But before you reach for the cyanide take comfort in the fact that if Stafford play like they did on Saturday it will take a superhuman effort from our boys not to at least draw the game.

Marston Road is possibly the worst place I’ve ever been to watch a ‘proper’ United match. Canvey runs it close but at least you can see the whole pitch there. At Stafford, one of Setanta’s trademark black boxes is bunged right in the middle of the away stand meaning view is restricted pretty much wherever you place yourself.

Not that the home fans have it much better – the stand behind one goal is a tent, and at the other end is an erection with so much scaffolding attached I thought it was still under construction until the Stafford fans shuffled underneath it in the second half. Add to this a tiny, uncut, bobbly pitch, and the most laughable ‘toilets’ I’ve ever seen, and you get the quintessential tin pot non-league experience. The sooner we get out of this horrible horrible division the better.

United’s team showed two welcome changes, with Boylan and Rendell replacing Marvellous Marvin and LFW up front. Stafford, who were riddled with injuries, seemed content to sit back and hit us on the break, and United took advantage early on, putting together some good moves, with Pitt and Boylan at the fulcrum.

It was the wing back who gave us the lead, skipping in from the left, beating two men and guiding a low shot into the corner beyond the dive of the keeper. A great strike from a player I saw labelled ‘a luxury’ on the messageboard last week – some people are never happy.

Rendell could’ve doubled our lead when he tapped in Wolleaston’s cross, but he found himself denied by the offside flag (I was in no position to see whether this was justified or not), and minutes later the home side made us pay. And what a rubbish goal to concede it was. A long ball over the top drifted towards Dan Gleeson, who for some reason headed the ball across his own goal under no pressure from any opposition player. First to react was veteran striker Neil Grayson, who beat Potter from 12 yards. 1-1.

Stephen Smith had joined the action in place of the injured Mark Convery, and he spurned a great chance to equalise soon afterwards. After playing a neat give and go with Rendell, he found himself clear on goal, but home keeper Scott Loach spread himself well and made the save. Loach was also equal to a long range blast from Wolly and a driven Smith free kick, while at the other end Warren Daniel had a header cleared off the line.

The second half continued in similar fashion, with United dominating possession but struggling to breach the massed ranks of Staffords back line. A couple of corners were cleared with ease, before we were handed a glorious chance to take the lead. Pitt’s cross into the box looked to have been dealt with by the home defence, but referee Tierney saw something almost no-one else in the ground did and awarded a penalty. Some reports say it was for handball, others a push, but it’s all fairly irrelevant as Boylan’s low kick lacked direction, and Loach was able to save with his legs.

Stafford almost made us pay minutes later when ex-U’s loanee Chris Flynn escaped down the left, and got a shot away which hit the post, struck Potter on the back, and was looping into the unguarded net until Albrighton appeared from nowhere to head off the line.

Soon afterwards JQ freshened up the forward line, bringing on Marv and LFW for Boyland and Rendell. This of course led to us going more direct, which played into the hands of the home sides lumbering back three. We continued to create chances - Pitt scrambled a shot wide from inside the box, and LFW turned well and rolled the ball across the six yard box where it agonisingly fell just behind the inrushing Robinson. But it wasn’t to be, and United were left to rue another two points dropped.

Unlike against Rushden, you couldn’t really fault our general build up play, but a combination of great goalkeeping and poor finishing let us down. To be honest I don’t think the chopping and changing of the forward line is doing us any favours, and JQ needs to decide his best pairing (which in terms of goal output is probably LFW and Rendell) and stick to it for a few games. One player who appears to be out of the equation for the moment is Marvin Robinson, who sustained a broken leg in a car crash over the weekend. Lets hope there isn’t any permanent damage, get well soon Marv!

Man of the Match: Courtney Pitt – A constant menace down the left. Almost all our good play came through him and he scored a terrific goal to boot.

Whinging Git of the Match: Stafford Manager Phil Robinson, who used his programme notes to moan about the U's not wanting to switch the kick off time to avoid a clash with the England match. Why he thinks anyone would forgo the pleasure of seeing their own team play, in favour of watching England stroll to an embarrassingly easy victory over some joke team from the Baltic is a mystery to me. Perhaps he should direct his vitriol at the real culprits – The FA who continue to schedule England games at 3pm on Saturday’s with little regard for anyone outside the Premier League.

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Friday 12 October 2007

New Chief Exec

Our club is gradually being taken over by baldies. I think it's being instigated by Jimmy Quinn, who is trying to surround himself with slapheads in a bid to convince himself that his rapidly receding hair line isn't all that bad.

All jokes aside, the appointment of Norman Gautrey has to be good news. We have are now going to have someone at the club full time managing things on the administrative side and, with all due respect to the people we have running things behind the scenes at the moment, we've needed a chief exec type figure for a long while.


It's nice to hear talk of new stadiums and getting back into the league etc etc, but the talk needs to be followed up with action. By the sounds of things plenty of thought has gone into the plan which Mr Gautrey is going to be putting in place, so hopefully the clubs current on pitch progress can be matched off it. Welcome aboard Norman!

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Wednesday 10 October 2007

U's:1 Diamonds:0

For my money, one of the most over-used phrases in football is: “It’s the sign of a good team when you play badly and win.” This assumes that at other times you play well and win – if you play badly all the time and sometimes win that’s surely not the sign of a good team, more a bad one that gets lucky every now and then.

Anyway, I’m waffling now, sorry. It’s just that as I was exiting the Abbey last night I must have overheard three or four people say “sign of a good team blah blah”. JQ is at it as well in his post match comments. We certainly played badly last night - and won obviously - but whether this makes us a good team or not, who knows.

To be fair the match didn’t start badly. With the sporting spotlight of the nation (well, that part of the nation that has Setanta) shining on the Abbey, United began like the proverbial express train, displaying some neat football and encouraging Gleeson and Pitt to get forward at every opportunity. Pitt swung over a couple of dangerous early crosses, one of which was punched away unconvincingly by visiting keeper Paul Nicholls (not the one who used to be in Eastenders).

Unfortunately our good start didn’t produce a goal or even a shot on target, and having weathered the early storm, Rushden got to grips with our tactics, closing down the space and shutting off the supply to the front two. It is easy to see why Diamonds have drawn so many games this season, as they seemed happy to stop us playing and try and occasionally counter using the pace of Simeon Jackson and the strength of Michael Rankine.

The visitors lack of adventure, coupled with a distinct absence of imagination in United’s play, meant it didn’t make for the most watchable contest. LFW put himself about on his return to the team, but struggled to make an impression, while Robinson tried hard as ever but looks increasingly like the new Marcus Richardson. The half time whistle came as a welcome relief from the tedium. Incidentally, the quiz in last nights programme was virtually impossible – surely nobody knows the record number of sendings off in a season...

Usually United start the second half well, but this time it was Rushden who took the initiative, thanks in no small part to the increasingly direct tactics of the hosts. With the ball not sticking up front, it was coming back at the defence at regular intervals. A half chance did come our way when Marv latched onto a flick from big Leo but mis-controlled when clear on goal.

Despite their possession, Rushden didn’t fashion too many opportunities, with the back three dealing comfortably with a succession of diagonal crosses into the box. Danny Potter was called into serious action once, changing direction superbly to make a low save after Martin Fosters shot took a massive deflection on route to goal.

We were crying out for substitutions, and JQ eventually obliged. Reed joined the fray and instantly added a bit of energy to our lacklustre midfield, while the front two were replaced by Boylan and Rendell shortly afterwards. Both new strikers made a positive impact, and suddenly we looked a bit more dynamic going forward. Just three minutes after joining the fray, Boylan latched onto a long clearance from Potter and held the ball up well before finding Gleeson, making a rare foray forward after a largely quiet second half. His cross wasn’t the best, but looped over to the far post where Rendell climbed highest to nod the ball into the net. Nicholls probably should’ve saved it, but could only palm the ball into the side netting. It's hard to see how he's keeping veteran baldie (and all round decent bloke) Paul Bastock out of the side.

Diamonds made a flurry of substitutions of their own, bringing on, amongst others, the dangerous Andy Burgess. But Gleeson stuck to his task well, and didn’t allow the rangy left winger to display any of the skills he used so effectively to tear us apart while playing for Oxford last season. The only really worrying moment came when Jackson escaped down the right channel, but shot wide under pressure from Albrighton.

In fact United should’ve made it 2-0 at the death. Quinton, who looked off the pace throughout, got clear on goal after a great dummy from Boylan. With the keeper at his mercy he tried to tee up Rendell for a tap in, but the pass was behind United’s top scorer and he couldn’t connect properly with the goal gaping. When the ball eventually came back to Reed, his angled shot went over the bar.

So obviously its great to be back to winning ways, especially with a couple of the teams around us dropping points. There’s plenty of room for improvement, particularly in midfield, which disappeared en masse for long periods in the second half. Quinton and Convery are too lightweight to play together, and none of the midfield trio provided adequate support for the front two. Up front, JQ will surely not persist with Robinson against Stafford after both Boylan and Rendell made good late cameos. Marv may be alright as a back up player, but he certainly doesn’t look like the sort of striker who can spearhead a sustained promotion challenge.

Man of the Match: Mark Albrighton – Could’ve been any of the back three really, but the skipper edges it as his return to the side made such a massive difference.






Quote of the match: “He has big eyes and big ears” – JQ on Josh Coulson in his programme notes. Makes him sound like Gollum from Lord of the Rings.

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Monday 8 October 2007

U's:2 Shaymen:2

I’ll kick off with a pearler of a quote from Mr James Quinn:

“I hate to see players looking nervous – there’s no reason for that at all. It’s not as if they’re in Iraq with people firing bullets at them.”

So there you go folks – the moral of the story is that there's no excuse for getting nervous at work unless you’ve got a terrorist pointing an M-16 at you.

It was certainly a case of two points dropped on Saturday against Halifax. I didn’t think we played that badly but, in contrast to the rest of the season, profligacy in front of goal cost us dearly.

The visitors took the lead in the 17th minute, after a scrappy opening quarter in which neither side created anything of note. Despite a distinct lack of appeals from the Halifax players, referee Halliday decided Jon Shaw’s tumble under challenge from Morrison warranted a penalty. It probably was a foul by Morro, who looked to be holding the strikers shirt, but if a penalty was given every time a similar incident occurred there would be about 30 per match. No matter, Shaw dusted himself off to send Potter the wrong way and United were behind again.

Mr Halliday appears to be from the school of refs who think that making big exaggerated hand gestures makes you Pierluigi Collina. I’ve got news for you mate, it doesn’t – it just makes you look like a twat who’s decided to practice semaphore on a football pitch. If he had concentrated less on playing to the crowd, and more on the laws of the game, he might’ve applied the rules a bit more consistently. As it was, there were periods of Saturday’s match where any hint of physical contact resulted in a free kick, while at other times players seemed to be able to get away with murder.

United were behind for just six minutes, as Marvellous-ish Marvin Robinson struck the equaliser on his debut. Rendell flicked Gleeson’s cross field pass wide to Pitt, whose douzey of a cross took out both the keeper and an inrushing defender, allowing Marv to score from close range.

Back came Halifax, and stand in skipper Danny Potter was quickly off his line to foil Daryl Taylor, who burst through a square looking backline but saw his shot blocked.

With half time looming, Shaw received his marching orders for a crude elbow on Morrison. The ex-Burton striker was getting visibly more and more wound up by the fans in the Habbin, who were telling him exactly what they thought of his penalty-getting antics. Having been booked for dissent moments earlier, Shaw launched into his assault on Morro which, while possibly not deliberate, certainly merited a second yellow if not the straight red it received.

We began the second half purposefully, using the width of the pitch to exploit our extra man. This paid off when Robinson teed up Wolleaston, whose first time shot from just outside the area rocketed past the keeper into the top corner. Hurrah!

A third goal would surely have killed off the visitors, but United couldn’t find the target: Gleeson dragged a cross-cum-shot wide, Quinton and Reed were denied by the keeper, and when Marvin tucked away the second rebound he was flagged offside.
After that little spell United sat back, happy to hit aimless long balls in the direction of Robbo and the out-of-sorts looking Scott Rendell. Although Marv had a penalty appeal turned down when he tumbled (rather theatrically) over the ‘Fax keeper, it came as no surprise when, with seven minutes left, the brilliantly named Cortez Belle blasted a shot past the keeper after a long throw had caused problems in the U’s defence.

Even then United had chances to win it. Pitt drove a shot wide when well placed, then forced a great save from the keeper with a close range header. And with the last kick of the match, sub Lee Boylan almost wriggled through the defence, but he couldn’t quite get his shot away and the chance was blocked.

So yeah, definitely a two points dropped, and it was a shame we couldn’t keep our composure against an eminently beatable side. I can’t help but think that if the suspended Albrighton and the benched LFW had been on the pitch the outcome might have been different. Certainly without the former the defence looked a lot less solid than it has done in recent weeks

Man of the Match: Danny Potter – Captain for the day put in an inspirational performance, sweeping up behind his porous looking backline and making several good saves to keep Halifax at bay. It would be good if he stopped diving the wrong way for penalties though.







Have you seen this man?

Naff-tattoo of the match: Matt Doughty, or rather the stars he has all the way up one of his arms. It’s not a good look.












Doughty and the missus?

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Friday 5 October 2007

Quinn to Gillingham?

True Story: When I was younger I used to think Gillingham was pronounced Gill-ingham rather than Jill-ingham. Nobody put me right on this until I was about 15.

Anyway, yes, I'm sure I'm not the only one who isn't wholly reassured by Lee Powers statement on the official site reference the Gills' interest in Jimmy?

http://www.cambridge-united.premiumtv.co.uk/page/NewsDetail/0,,10423~1127610,00.html

Not exactly the most vehement hands off warning ever is it? I'm hoping our leader wanted to seem a bit indifferent because of the way JQ has been angling for a new contract recently. We may have started the season in formidable fashion but now is not the time to be giving out new deals. If we're still up with the leaders at Christmas then maybe it'll be a different story.

I imagine this will all blow over and Gillingham will find a better candidate to take over, but I just hope the board aren't rail-roaded into giving Jimmy a new contract on the strength of a good quarter of a season and a bit of interest elsewhere.

Don't get me wrong, I would be gutted if we had to change manager again now, and I think JQ has show himself to be a competant manager for this level. But the board must make sure they don't take unnecessary risks with the clubs finances, or else we could have a repeat of 2004/05 on our hands.

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CUFC in Nature

Number 3: Andy Duncan and a Wolf (N.B. This lookalike also applies to Adam Davies)




Duncs?





Woolfie?


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Tuesday 2 October 2007

FGR:3 U's:1 - The Joy of Text

If, like me, you can’t bare a U’s game to be going on without you knowing the score, being out of Radio Cambridgeshire range can present several problems.

When this situation occurs I usually favour keeping up to date with what’s happening via WAP, but this is fraught with difficulty, mainly because the scores are always slow to update. I remember one occasion a couple of years ago when I enjoyed a night out safe in the knowledge that we’d secured a point by drawing 0-0 at Halifax, only to pick up the paper the next day and discover we’d lost 1-0.

So this weekend, with a trip to Canterbury on the horizon, I decided to sign up to the official site’s text alert service. I’d actually thoroughly recommend this as a method of following matches, and in future I may even eschew the delights of mssrs. Johnson and Line in favour of updates by phone.

Why I hear you ask? Well, to start with I hate listening to football on the radio. When listening to a commentary my imagination turns every passage of play which the opposition have into a dangerous goalscoring opportunity. The crowd always pre-empts the commentator too which only adds to my state of constant panic. Plus there is the utter inanity of Johnson and Line (which I will go into in more detail another time) which just ends up making me cross, even if we are strolling a comfortable victory.

On Saturday I was able to enjoy my afternoon, with only the odd moment of disappointment when the messages came through announcing Stuart Fleetwood’s ever increasing goal tally. Thus United’s first defeat of the season passed me by a bit without ruining the entire weekend (which probably would have been the case had I been sitting at home listening to every moment of excruciating crapness).

So yeah, anyway, we lost. I think the signs were there in the Aldershot match that a lot of the players are knackered, so not having a Tuesday game this week is probably a good thing. Hopefully Jimmy will get them rested up and raring to go again against Halifax this Saturday.

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