U's 4 - 1 Haze - Growing up badly

None of us are getting any younger. Except policemen. And maybe Cliff Richard.

It was my birthday last week, and while I'm still clinging onto my 20's, I'm beginning to feel the pull of middle age. On Sunday I mowed my own lawn for the first time in my life (that's because I've only just acquired a lawn by the way, not because I usually get someone else to do it), and spent time tidying the shed, feeling a vague sense of satisfaction on completion of my tasks. It's worrying, very worrying.

But I hope that as I get older some things never change, such as the slight feeling of awe that comes with meeting a professional footballer, even a fifth tier one with questionable arm tattoos.

Because before Saturday's match with Hayes and Yeading, I got to shake hands with the great Danny Crow, and the occasion had me stumbling over my words and grinning inanely like a bashful school girl. Danny went on to prove his greatness by netting two more goals as United strolled to a comfortable victory over Hayes, but it was the performance of his strike partner, Adam Marriott, that really caught the eye.

Maz is different gravy, ketchup, mayonnaise, burger sauce, or any other condiment you can think of. He seems to [cliche]have everything in his locker[/cliche], and while he is still a bit immature as a player - as evidenced in the second half of Saturday's game when he brilliantly bamboozled three players but then tried to score from a ridiculous angle when a pass to the unmarked Simon Russell would've left the winger with a tap in - next season I think he'll be making big waves.

Other than that it was fairly routine stuff, with McAuley, Russell, and Palmer particularly standing out. Lingy's comments at the end about "peoples favourites leaving" in the close season suggest that, as expected, the end as nigh for Danny Potter, which would be a shame, but probably not a surprise given the form of Simon Brown and the need to cut costs - I would assume Pottsy is one of our higher paid players.

Elsewhere, Stevenage are in the football league, Man Utd are back in the title race, and Histon are likely survive their relegation battle due to other teams being shitter than them. Forget immigrants or knife crime, if these aren't examples of Broken Britain then I don't know what are, and I'll vote for any MP who promises to come up with a suitable solution.

*Send us your 20-word match report on the Hayes and Yeading game. Email cufcblog@googlemail.com, visit the U's Blog twitter page, or leave a comment under this post.