Here we go again

Despite being relentlessly boring and incident free, this closed-season has passed awfully quickly. I suppose one of the benefits of being regular play-off losers is that it shaves a good three or four weeks off the football-less period between May and July.

I always struggle a bit to get excited about pre-season games. Nick Hornby memorably described friendlies as "methodone football", and indeed surely only an addict would consider trekking out to Ely tonight, especially when two of the principal joys of pre-season will be absent: we won't get a first look at the new players because, er, there aren't any, and the stereotypical pre-season warm weather seems to have done a runner as well.

"The lads all came back in good shape and I'm proud of them for the way they've looked after themselves during the summer," said the Brabinator in his first Bland-a-thon of the season. "We've been working had on fitness straightaway, but I don't believe in hiding the ball for three or four weeks and making them work exclusively on their fitness like some managers do."

Speaking of losers who are obsessed with fitness, it's all go over at the Glassworld, with the potential arrival of United rejects Shane "Too good for the Conference" Tudor and Adam "Too good for the Conference" Tann. Having described Cambridge as "boring" in his legendary Four Four Two interview, Tudor must surely be relishing the prospect of experiencing the cultural smorgasbord that is Histon and Impington. Do they still do kareoke at the Railway Vue?